No flowers were harmed in the making of this blog.
I thought maybe it was time to answer a few Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)that come to me from the readers. Here they are, in no particular order.
Q: Are you a midget?
A: No. But I played one on TV.
Q: Would you like me to send you unsolicited advice?
A: No. However, feel free to send dark chocolate.
Q: If one train leave Pittsburgh at 3:00 on a Tuesday, going 45 mph in an easterly direction, and another train leaves Cleveland at 2:00 on that same Tuesday, going 30 mph in a westerly direction, when will they collide?
A: Who are these people?! I have no idea. Look at a map? Or maybe take a plane, just to be safe.
Q: If you were stuck on a deserted island with one book, one choice of food and one toy, what would they be?
A: Hmm…Okay. The Bible. Pepperoni, black olive and sausage pizza. And a gun. The pizza won’t last forever, right?
Q: Do you have any pets?
A: Yep. A pair of black cats and a black guinea pig. We’re all about matching.
Q: Were you a child prodigy?
A: (shuffles toe in dirt, hunches shoulders) Nope. And I’m not an adult one, either.
Q: Do you have any siblings?
A: I have a brother and two stepsisters. And there is no truth to the rumor that I used to beat my brother up on a regular basis.
Q: What’s on your “bucket list”?
A: Running (and finishing) a marathon, rhinoplasty, seeing all the “Love” series movies inspired by Janette Oke novels back-to-back. Thank you, Hallmark Channel!
Q: If you could go back in time and say one thing to your younger self, what would it be?
A: You will have boyfriends. You will not get little white marks on your teeth from not brushing them every minute while you have braces. Your voice matters.
Q: Does Jonathon have a job yet?
A: Hey, this is about me! And no. Not yet.
Q: You love running. What advice would you give to someone starting out?
A: Go slowly. Walk a lot. Run a little. Amby Burfoot has a great book out on this subject. Running is at least 80% mental. If you think you can and you’re not in excruciating pain, you can. Sometimes even if you are, you still can. If you live close to me, maybe we can run together sometime.
Q: If you weren’t a Christian, what religion would you most align yourself with?
A: If I lived in an ancient culture, thousands of years ago, definitely a sun worshiper. I need it! Otherwise, probably something of my own concocting. More interesting that way. A little bit of this, a little bit of that…”Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble”..
Q: What are the best and worst things about being a mother:
A: Wow, that’s a tough one! The best thing is probably seeing your child grow and develop into the person they were meant to be, and to know you had a hand in that. I love seeing the kids excel at things, get excited about activities or hobbies. Sometimes they’re things Jonathon or I like to do, too. I also enjoy seeing them handle tough situations with grace. The worst is when they’re hurt, either physically or emotionally, and you can do nothing to fix it except apply a band-aid either out of the box or of physical affection.
Q: What are you most looking forward to for the rest of your life?
A: Staying married to Jonathon and growing old(er) together. We need a porch swing! Continuing to grow as an individual and discovering new possibilities in this life, new friendships and loving Jesus. Watching the kids grow up and become parents themselves (God willing), and seeing them fulfill their destinies. I want to suck the marrow out of life, every day.